There aren't too many advantages of upper years that I commend to younger folks. One exception is the advantage of memories of events and people going back to 1930.

As a young child I had the great experience of often being around the veterans (and their children) of a war that ended 65 to 70 years before.

Most who had survived were in their eighties or nineties and not always in the best of health.

The Davis family is one of the largest families in America, I believe fifth in size. Because of the size and pioneering spirit, some of the Davises did marry into families that ultimately chose to serve on the Yankee side of the War For Southern Independence.

This was particularly true when you consider my branch of the family was prominent in the Shenandoah Valley of Virginia. The area slightly to the west was to become West Virginia during the war. It was in this area where there was a good example of brother against brother, or cousin against cousin.

It is the area where Stonewall was born and raised. It is the area where the famous Stonewall Brigade was formed and which my grandfather, Hezikiah, served.

It is also the area that my other grandfather, Albert McQuain, grew up in and was part of a family that supported the Union.

As an example of how intense this situation was, after the war ended and the terrible reconstruction came to what some believe an end, nature took its course. A Davis boy met and married a McQuain girl. A McClain boy whose family fought for the Confederacy and were decidedly Democrats, married a McQuain girl. The wedding could only take place after Grandpa McQuain, Republican precinct chairman, had an agreement that the first child born of the marriage would be a Republican, the second a Democrat, etc. There would be no imbalance in his precinct. As a result, my cousin, Pearl, was a lifelong Republican and her sister, Fern, a lifelong Democrat.

Now I come to the theme of my story. For all the differences resulting from a chaotic war that no one could ever envision, for all of the miserable period of Reconstruction, two families of opposite sides came together and produced great progress in the area for generations. I wish there were time and space to describe the leadership in many fields provided by these pioneers.

There was love, wonderful times, lots of sharing of visits, some foolishness and family pranks. In hard times, help for each other.

More than anything was the respect for the honor of the soldiers that served on opposing sides. I don't recall hearing a disparaging word about any of my relatives who served in the war on either side.

These days this memory is precious because the respect that prevailed in those days by the people who were most affected by the events of that war. Today others with little or no connection or empathy have chosen to pronounce self-serving judgments that reflect poorly on the honor of those that served loyally and the symbols they revered. Many never to return or those who did, to spend the rest of their lives with severe physical disabilities.

To more clearly define what I'm trying to say, I beg your short indulgence to a perfect example of a McQuain girl who in the thirties wrote the following poem about Confederate Memorial Day. Her name was Garnet McQuain Davis. My mother.

"There were not many left that day
to march in Grand Review;
Confederates of '61
Were now but very few.
A wavering line of veterans
Attired in sombre grey
Were gathered once again to march
Upon Memorial Day.

A muffled drum was beating,
While falling into line
Were men in faded uniforms,
Yet looking very fine;
While feeble hands so proudly
Held gun and bayonet,
Though years had passed since fighting days
They bore arms grandly yet.

One grizzled man who'd lost a limb
And walked upon a crutch,
Yet felt just pride and honor
That he had done so much,
And given in the cause that he
Believed was just and right,
Stood in the ranks alone until
There fell upon his sight...

Another aged veteran
Who'd worn the coat of blue,
In other days when for his land
He bore arms proudly too.
The man in grey saluted him,
and called, "you damn lone yank,
Come here and be a comrade,
and fall into the rank."